Wednesday, January 24, 2007


It’s been a long time ago when I worked with one of the well-known state bank in Indonesia. Therefore it’s been a long time ago since I’ve become one of the “little princesses” in a “small kingdom”.

I never enjoyed being a “little princess” since all the bureaucracy makes me feel like a snobbish person, like a paralyzed person.

It’s hard for me to be myself. I have to watch all my behavior, the way I laugh, the way I sit, the way I greet the director and their wives, my make up, my dress, my language, every single things. Therefore when finally I could move to JV (join venture) company with western culture, I felt like a bird. The freedom is in my hand. But I was wrong, after being served for almost 2.3 years and no one have to serve me, the freedom was like a complete stranger for me.

I was a little bit shocked that time and missed my “golden moment” for a while when I realized that I have to line up for check in the airport, no one carried my baggage, no one accompanied me in the waiting area. No company’s car ready to pick me up in the airport. Even when I arrived, no one pick me up in the runway.

Now, when I look back into my 1st freedom day, I have to thank God, that He gave me the chances to taste the life of “little princes” and put me back into reality. Otherwise, I will be a complete snobbish person in the world.

Today, when I attend the ISO ceremony of the well-known state bank with my COO, the feeling of gratitude back again.

Watching my friend who could act differently at the same time, makes me understand the meaning of my best friend advice in replied my complain of the “kingdom value”. His advice was, “the most important is in everything you do, you did that on purpose”.

Yes, he’s true. When I remembered every scene during that ceremonial process, I could picture a well-known woman, one of the “crème de la crème” of Indonesian society, body language. The way she took the position when one of the photographer took her picture with the most important person in that bank. The way she dressed, laughed, every single thing was on purpose.

It looks like everybody was wearing a mask. I noticed “H”, a close friend of my friend. The way she greet people is based on the title the person have. If the person ranks is below her, then that person should be ready not be seen by her. It was several years ago when she was nobody. But now, after she became “somebody”, the way she acts looks like a “Queen”.

I was wondering, what happened if someday, she become “completely nobody”.
Her friend, who is my friend, was like her. He will greet you only if he thinks it’s appropriate to greet you or if he needs something from you. Now, when he became “completely nobody”, seems that everybody had forgotten him.

….. As my COO said during our way back to the office, the most important thing is not all that kind of ISO but the Value, how you value your customer, your staff and yourself.

Saturday, January 20, 2007

A house of mine

I always thought of myself as a house
I was always what I lived in
It didn’t need to be big
It didn’t even need to be beautiful
It just needed to be mine
I became what I was meant to be
I built myself a life
I built myself a house

(from Life as a House)

It’s been more than 2 weeks since the 1st day in 2007, the day where everybody made a statement of their own resolution, when my best friend called me and asked my 2007 resolution.

I was speechless because I just realized that I don’t have a time to withdraw myself and stay in my nutshell. I was busy with my routine, and procrastinated the time that I’ve given to myself.

Until last night, after I read an article of Bill Gates speech when he got the award for his philanthropic work and watch a movie called “Life as a House”, I found the answer of the question.

The answer is I want to build a house of my life, a house where everybody knows by a glimpse that it was mine. A house where everybody can stop by and take a rest before continue their journey. A house painted with colorful picture of the nature and human life. A house that build on the edge of a cliff, where people can see the horizon and listen to the waves of the sea.

I know it’s not easy to build that kind house or difficult. It needs a strength, patient and passion. A long lasting resolution.

Like what George said in that movie “with every crash of every wave, I hear something now. I never listened before. I’m on the edge of a cliff, listening. Almost finished.”