Monday, April 27, 2009

Vin Diesel - FB 24 April 2009

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous ? Actually, who are you not to be ? We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same
(Vin Diesel – FB 24 April 2009)

I read the above quotation from Vin Diesel’s status in Facebook. Quite surprise with what he wrote and made me think, am I brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous ? Am I never wanted to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous ?

I think everybody knows the answer, we all brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous; no one can say that we are not that brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous. Even when we are comparing ourselves with the King, the Queen, the model, the actor, the answer still the same.

Who are they ? compare to us ? They have the popularity. We ? We have the popularity also ?
Brilliant ? We also brilliant. Talented ? We also talented. Fabulous ? We also fabulous.

We are special, every human being are special because as Vin Diesel wrote in his status, that as we let our own light shine then unconsciously we let other do the same.

Sometimes we didn’t realize of whom we are and we tend to copied someone else without even facing the mirror and find the beauty of ourselves.

I can’t write more than that especially since the quotation itself really moves me.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Kartini and Feminism

A note from my hybernating period .. to commemorate Kartini's day

Visited another country just for a vacation is something that I never dream for. Not because I could not afford it, it’s just because I love the beach and the sun which shine for 24 hours (except for rainy days).

My trip is always a business trip combine with a vacation trip after the exhausting day of exhibition, working or even training.

Therefore, when my husband and in-laws offered me to spend four days to the “most-common-visited” country by the Indonesian, the paradise of shopping sale, I felt a little bit uncomfortable.

The reason was simple, because it is not a business trip, it’s a vacation and vacation is something that I always plan ahead. I could not go to a vacation without prepare the details of my trip. Even to the place that I always visit, still planning is in my top priority.

And … the journey starts at Emirates.

As we all know, Arab Saudi is the first destination for Indonesian women workers. They work for Arab Saudi’s family helping the house wife in managing the house holds. Once a year, they go back to Indonesia before they flew back to Arab Saudi again.

The education? Arab Saudi didn’t ask for higher education, at minimum they have to pass their elementary school. The language or the culture was being trained by the agent before they got a place to work. Therefore we can imagine the difficulty they have to face in listening the instruction given by their master.

Anyway, back to Emirates, in my row – we were sitting at 4 seater – one of the passenger were one of Indonesian women workers.

I felt pity for them, we left Indonesia around 08.20 pm and for the long trips like that, at least we have to prepare our clothes to fight with the coldness but this Indonesian woman worker only wore a shirt and a suit; besides their ability to communicate in English, even though it is a simple question.

In our row the Indonesian woman worker sat next to Indonesian rich, educated guy. Then here the story continues ….

When the female attendant asked the Indonesian woman worker to fasten her seat belt, she didn’t know how to do it.

Our Indonesian guy didn’t say anything not even helped her.

Then when it comes to choose the dinner, she also couldn’t say her decision. She didn’t even understand that she has to make a choice.

Like before, our beloved Indonesian guy just sat quietly but now he gave his odd look to our Indonesian woman worker.

The last one is when our flight transit in Singapore and the flight attendant asked our Indonesian woman worker to leave the plane.

Our Indonesian guy just left the plane and as usual didn’t say anything while the flight attendant made every effort to make our Indonesian worker understood the meaning of transit.

Once again, I felt pity for them. They just left Indonesia in 1 hour flight from Jakarta to Singapore and they have received the worst treatment from the same Indonesian citizen not the Arabian.

And now, today, when we commemorate Kartini, the Indonesian woman leader of emancipation, we forgot to touch the basis of emancipation. The basis that I called “Respect”.

Emancipation is all about respect, respect from both side, as a human being not based on gender. Emancipation is all about recognition that woman as well as man contribute the same thing through different shape, different form.

Like what the Indonesian guy did to our Indonesian woman worker, if there’s respect even though they are a helper, then he will help them, guide them in that 1 hour flight.

I read in the article in one of Indonesia woman’s magazine, the writer stated that Indonesian woman always fight for their right but at the same time they need the man treat them like a woman, whilst if we asked for the right similarity then we have to stop to protest if the man treat us like them.

Maybe I’m not a modern woman, maybe ..; but for me, emancipation is about accepting that we’re different from man. Emancipation is about stopping to beg the mars people to treat the Venus differently while at the same time fight for the similarity. Emancipation is about knowing man’s and woman’s superiority.

Kartini never fight for feminism and it’s totally wrong to put Kartini as the leader of the Indonesian woman liberation.

….my two cents…

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Office Politics - The Opportunist and The Safety Player

Just recently, there’s a new ritual in my office, every 9.30 AM we have our regular morning meeting with the Bosses and the Big Bosses.

When I knew that my name is in the list, I felt that am in prison. Not because that I can’t have my morning chit-chat with my team or my colleague but because I only have limited time to finish my task, to discuss the idea with my team, to held my own meeting and most importantly am loosing my team to “think”.

At first, I felt a lil bit bored until the last three days, I found the new activity by watching and “reading” my colleague answer and gesture when our Big Boss of the Bosses threw his questions which gave me the lesson of “office politics”.

I’m not that person who loves “office politics”. For some reason I always have the beliefs that if we never stabs somebody in the back then no one will do that for me, so we can work in harmony as a team to achieve our own goals and everybody will do the same.

Naïve ? Certainly. Even though I have been stabbed by someone in the back, I never changed my “naïve” opinion.

I remember, one of my friends told me that am too naïve, that as a grown up person I have to understand that people will use every single way to climb up to the top, that we can’t make friends in the office. I was so mad at him for accused me as a naïve person and started from that day, I want to proof that his opinion was wrong.

But these last three days, I saw the drama of Office Politic, where finally I can spot my friends who are under the opportunist list.

Not within 24 hours, one of my friends has changed his opinion and suddenly became amnesia of what he had said before.

The others changed their opinion just because Ms. X, who has the power to the top, suddenly changed her opinion too.

All the opportunist follow where the wind blows, as long as Ms. X didn’t saw them as her enemy, then it must be safe for them to march behind Ms. X and become the Yes Man.

Besides the opportunist there’s a group consist of “Play Safe” people. Their comment is under the “abstain comment”. Just like the opportunist, they will state their final answer after the Big Boss of the Bosses stated his point of view.

I wish I can be like the opportunist or the play safe, I really wish. But every time I want to follow them, my inner voice advice me to become the countable person. So here I’m, speak the truth to the world and the big boss or the bosses may not like me because of my opinion, but at least I don’t have to put the mask.

I may be dumb for not using the opportunity to flowering myself to the Big Boss but at least I don’t have to make the up the story every time or have to loose my time just because the Boss love to get his team to gather together to praise the Lord.

I don’t want questioning the opportunist and play safe behavior. For me, the opportunist and the play safe is merely the character of that person. And for me, character is something that you can’t change. It’s there, they born and lives with that. The only person who can change it is themselves.

And today, during the meeting, when the Big Boss made his decision, the opportunist just sit there quietly without saying a word. Whilst Ms. X still fight for her opinion.
If you asked me which one that I like better, certainly I will say that I like to have a friend like Ms. X, even though Ms. X stated her opinion because of her hidden agenda but she’s never afraid to tell the people of her stand of point.

I know that by choosing to become the normal people, the one who can easily stated their opinion; I may not have a lot of friends at the office. But office is the place to work, isn’t it ? Not a place to find a friend.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Remembering The Old Days

I was capturing my old friends from the view winder of my camera, when suddenly I realized that how we missed our old days, when world were so colorful, when future were so real, when our romance will be last forever and our friendship will be last forever.

There are several friends that we haven’t met for almost 18 years, some of them we haven’t met for almost 5 years, where the rest we still see each other at least once a year and some of it is our best friend – our life time friends.

I still can picture their old faces but not their new faces. But even though years have taken away our “young and fresh look”, and put the wrinkles, the flabby tummy, the fat to our look, they can’t take away our memories of our youth.

There was a time when we were so mad at our Nun, the Head Master, especially since we, who gather together were her lovely student. Not because we were so nice but because almost each of us was in her “punishment” list because of our “youth energy”.

That time and years after that we still remember her with our “madness memory”, until today when we heard that she were suffer of brain cancer, then we realized that we’ve become what we’ve now is because of our “Discipline Nun”.

Our Head Master, Sr. Clarentia, she knew every single details of what we did, our lover, our friends, everything. Until now, I’m still anxious to find out how she collected all the information.

Looking my old friends through the camera lens bring back all the old memories. We were from different class and united by our “naughtiness, romance, and brothers/sisters” and until today even though the romance is not there, we still bring back our friendship in our loving memory.

Have we changed ? Yes .. For sure and what makes me proud that each of us can change the label of “naughty student” to “better person”. No one can believe that one of our friends who is in the wicked student in the world, now is actively shown his care to Indonesian island, be in that expedition and wrote the book. One of the other “wicked student in the world” have become a succeed entrepreneur.

That day, we cherished our moment, open the old album, seeing the old faces, tried to remember names and compared them with their today’s look, missed our friends who lives far away from us, sharing our old romance stories, stories of our teacher, all the punishment we got from our teacher and headmaster, every things and still 1 day is not enough to cater all the memories we have in senior high.

Me ? I’m happy. I met her, my sister. She is my senior when I entered senior high. I once was part of her gang and for me she’s the only one who’s humble and sincere. We haven’t seen each other after she graduated and moved to Bandung, where she pursues her wishes at ITB.

Well….time flies so fast, we were not young anymore but that day brings back the youthful to us, that day brings back our old times to us.

We know we may not see each other often, but for sure we know that the memories of our old times live in our heart.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

My Good Friday Reflection

I am the witness
To His fearless death.
I am a token of His
last promise

- Forgiveness –
I am the Cross

This noon, I knelt down quietly, looking at the cross covered with purple satin.
I remembered all the despair that I felt recently and compared my despair with His suffering.
I remembered the entire worst thing that I’ve done and compared the burden of my sin that He has to burden.

This noon, I sat quietly, and felt the pain inside myself.
The pain that come from my selfishness
The pain that come from my doubt to His Grace

This noon, when I kiss Him.
I know that He will hold my hand through the darkness of my cross
I know that He will carry me when I’m fall
I know that He will give me strength

This noon, I know that He will keep His promise …